Coming off of yesterday’s blog post: Crushing the Now, I want to take this thought even further. Thinking of your Enneagram type, your temperament, your relationships, and your life’s circumstances let’s dive into “how” you can crush the now which could eventually lead to your next. All of us can get fixated on what’s next. It’s more of a struggle for certain types (like 8’s, 1’s, 3’s, and 7’s) but all of us will eventually get fixated on what’s “next.” Maybe we fixate on what’s next to avoid pain, climb the next ladder of success, avoid conflict, and more. And, if we really want to get there we absolutely must “crush the now.” Or, another great way to put it = “Bloom where you are.” Let me explain.
Leading Where You Are
Recently I was attending a leadership conference in Orange County, CA. Listening to that many highly engaging leaders can be overwhelming but there’s one that stood out to me that echo’s even further the sentiment of “crushing the now.” Jamie Ivey (follow her here) spoke about contentment and leadership using a powerful illustration: a flower blooming. Her point = Bloom where you are.
What she was getting at is you must fixate on leading where you are currently instead of fixating on where you want to be. For me, I know I want this blog and coaching business to be a raging success. But, that does not happen overnight. Instead, I must crush the now and bloom where I’m at. I’m in a leadership position with growing influence. That’s where God has placed me; that’s where I need to bloom. BUT, here’s the tension…
Focusing on “other’s” success
The struggle for us is that we live in a day and age where the places other people are “crushing it” or “blooming” is always right in front of us. Just go to Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, or listen to any podcast and the comparison game begins to play in your mind and you fixate on where you want to be instead of where you are. What’s the solution? I’ll let Jaimie speak for herself. Here’s what I wrote down in my notes in very BIG letters:
”Mind your business in the stage of life you are currently in.“
In other words, the desire for what is not yours will cost you the blessing of what you already have. Don’t rob your own blessing. Don’t rob your own story of success and fulfillment by wishing you had somebody else’s. Man, that will kick you right in the teeth.
Think about it and it will make a lot of sense. You need to focus on the stage of life you’re currently in and stop trying to get to the next stage prematurely. An example I have comes from when I was single. I used to just want to get married like all my friends were finding themselves doing. I wanted to provide for somebody, be with somebody, make memories with somebody (sound familiar?). It literally robbed me of many of my blessings I had at that time. The main thing it robbed me of was: who I was becoming. And, when I began to fixate on who I was becoming, my focus in life changed. And it allowed me to be patient and wait for somebody else who was focused on who they were becoming. And, when we met, it was incredible.
Surely you have your own seasons of life you wish you were in. Maybe it’s that you thought you would be married (or still married) by now. Maybe you thought you would have kids by now. Maybe you thought that surely you would be further in your career by now. Financially, you DEFINITELY thought it would look different. Whichever stage of life you are in right now, do this = bloom where you are! This will lead you to crushing the “now” to prepare you for what’s “next.”